Where the air-raid shelter stood, our canopy now stands

A contribution by Enny Hoenselaar, initiator of Healing Grounds Milsbeek.

The house in Milsbeek where I welcome people stands on land we were given by my husband Ronald’s father. Where an air-raid shelter stood during the Second World War, our canopy now stands - and that is where I feel safe. That I ended up here has everything to do with the grounds I stood on before.

My parents’ ground

As a child, I loved travelling back with my parents from our townhouse in Nijmegen to their native villages in Limburg. Dad was from Beringe, close to the Peel peat fields. Mum was from the hamlet of Heide, near Venray. Whenever I asked her about her childhood, she usually fell silent. I saw the places where the war had wreaked havoc, and where Mum, as a seventeen-year-old girl, was told bluntly by her father: “Courage dies.” Almost overnight, they had to survive that weight: switch off, stop going to school, and above all, never speak of what hurt.

That native ground wasn’t healing for my parents themselves at all. It was the place of fear, loss, discipline and survival. By taking us back there later and telling us only the lighter stories, they tried, in their own way, to make that ground a little healing after all. For me, it became the place where, from a young age, I learned to feel what was left unspoken.

The forest in Schaijk

I first experienced real relaxation in the forest. When I was six, Dad bought a patch of woodland in Schaijk. For six weeks every summer holiday, our family spent time there. Among the pine trees, I suddenly saw my parents relax, and I was free to roam without a care. That woodland is where I had the happiest moments of my childhood - a place where, for once, I didn’t have to worry about being “good enough”.

The ground in Milsbeek

Now that I’m putting the finishing touches to my autobiography, I’m encountering all these grounds - and many more - again. I’m digging them all up once more. After thirty-eight years of working in various parts of mainstream healthcare, I now know what ground I’m standing on.

Six years ago, I changed course. I began working as a life coach from my own home, guiding people who notice that the old no longer fits, while the new has yet to reveal itself. Together, we explore what is really going on and which choices help them stand firmly on their own ground again.

As the initiator of the Peace Garden in Milsbeek, I know first-hand how important a piece of land can be for inner peace. Since 2025, I’ve been the driving force behind Healing Grounds Milsbeek, a place where visitors can find professionals who look at the whole person.

Now that both my parents are gone, and I’ve let their critical gaze rest, I dare to open my heart wide. We all carry the traces of the ground we were shaped on. That weight doesn’t have to stay yours to carry. On what ground do you flourish?